Dear Miscarriage and Stillborn Loss,
You have entered the lives of many, taking from them a deeply wanted and precious life. You are most unwelcome. Yet, you come. I never expected you’d come knocking on my door. But you did. Twice. You came and left my arms empty and my heart broken. And, now, the very mention of you makes me cringe. Miscarriage. As if somehow I dropped the ball and it was all my fault. It wasn’t! And, Stillborn? Perhaps an accurate name, but it, in no way, comforts or articulates all. So many people make assumptions about me, since you came into my life. I’ve fought the black-hole of feeling like a “statistic.” You impacted all my future pregnancies… my eyes now opened to life and death. Though my body is made to grow life, life does not belong to me. I may desperately want a baby of mine to hold, but know that that life could fade in one unexpected instant. Like the shattering of precious china.
But, you see, our Heavenly Father uses even you. (Romans 8:15; Galatians 4:6) Our GOD IS so much greater. Even in this hard and broken world, His sovereign plan is at work, and He fights for our eternal souls. Because of Christ’s victory, death has lost its sting! (1 Corinthians 15:55-57) And, even in the depth of hurt, there is beauty… because, MY GOD IS THERE. Oh, how very near He comes. (Psalm 34:18) Because of the brokenness you brought, I have experienced a very clear glimpse of God. (Psalm 34:8-10) I learned I can trust Him unconditionally, because ALL is already in His hands. He is life. (Colossians 1:15-17) Our days on the earth are numbered. And He gifted every single baby to us for just the right amount of days on earth. Their deaths were not unexpected to Him, and came at the time allotted… just as all do. (Psalm 139:13-18) And, I will see them again. I now live with expectant eyes fixed on the unseen. And, I will NOT give up. God is good. Always. No matter the outcome of any pregnancy… whether they come or not… I will live for His glory. What else could I do!? (2 Corinthians 4:5-18) He is LORD of all. And, one day, He will return and right all that is wrong, and we will all be together again. (John 14:1-6) PRAISE GOD!!!